Harry Potter and the Chamber of Secrets (2002)

What was cute, funny, creative, and original in the first Potter film, only comes off flat, disjointed, stale, and regurgitated in the second. Much to my regret, the red headed step-child is back, dumbing down each scene with inane comments and a faulty rod.

The "Oh, I'm so VERY evil" slicked back, blonde haired, Nazi mini-wizard plays his one note sneer throughout the entire film. All the special-ed Krippendorf pals are still tripping over themselves to kiss Harry's magical ass. And the featured evil creature looks like a retooled prop taken from the set of Tremors.

Rating: D-