The Dink (2026)

 

I felt obligated to see this one as an avid pickleballer. The opening premise and character introductions were actually pretty good, but it descended into lame tropes from there. 

Rating: C-

Disclosure Day (2026)

 

It’s an interesting take on the revelation that aliens-exist genre. They’ve tried really hard to imagine how our world would react to this knowledge, but I found it unrealistic. The story plays out more like a long episode of The X-Files, with some corny plot holes to boot. 

With Spielberg at the helm, the film is gripping and well crafted. Emily Blunt acts the hell out of it. Just don’t expect any sort of satisfying conclusion.

Rating: C

Backrooms (2026)

 

There’s a great movie tucked away somewhere in those backrooms, but the film we got isn’t it. I loved the idea around secret backrooms that go on forever, with unknown boogiemen hiding behind every door. It’s a mystery that needs exploring. 

Unfortunately, after revealing said mystery, the screenwriter simply gave up. Big letdown from the audience’s perspective. Such is the case with so many high concept films. They never deliver in the third act. 

Rating: D

Enola Holmes 3 (2026)

 

They cranked out this third Maltese turd with a snoozer of a plot and underuse of key characters. Lacked the spark of the first two. Didn’t need to be made.

Rating: C-

Greenland 2: Migration (2026)

 

I loved the first film so much that I wanted to see the sequel, despite poor reviews. As a post-apocalyptic film, it’s not bad. Everyone struggling to survive in a heavily damaged world. Trouble seems to find this family every step of the way on their journey, some more compelling than others. The end is cheesy. 

Rating: C

The Castle (1997)

 

Considered an Australian classic. Moderately interesting characters with a lukewarm plot. I expected more. 

Rating: C-

Power Ballad (2026)

 

I’m a big fan of John Carney films, but this was a miss. The songs themselves weren’t very catchy. The element of fun and joy that is a staple of his other works was missing here. In fact, it was a bit depressing. 

Rating: C-

The Furious (2025)

 

I’ll say it. There were too many fights that never ended. They took so much damage that it became ridiculous they were still alive. Yes, the fight choreography was incredible. But a movie needs more. 

It’s a shame these two weren’t around to infiltrate Trump’s child trafficking ring and mete out justice. Sadly, in real life, the bad guys win and get elected president. We’re living in the most depressing action movie ever conceived–all the deviants escaping justice and rising in power. 

Rating: C

Enola Holmes 2 (2022)

 

Another dangerous mystery for the Holmes siblings to solve. Moriarty is introduced, and at the very end: Dr. Watson. Enjoyed the first one a bit more. 

Rating: C+

Enola Holmes (2020)

 

It’s a shame Millie Bobby Brown’s talents were wasted on Stranger Things rather than an Enola Holmes series. Still, this first film manages to tell a layered story that sets up two sequels, to date. 

Family friendly, yet with sufficient danger and action to make outcomes matter. It’s a fun take on the Holmes universe. 

Rating: B-

Over Your Dead Body (2026)

 

Grim stuff. Despite a few chuckles, there’s nothing to endear the viewer to this film. 

Rating: D+

Blades Of The Guardians (Biao Ren: Feng Qi Da Mo) (2026)

 

Why are Chinese action films always so silly? Weak acting, implausible fight choreography, and convoluted storylines make it impossible to be invested in the characters. Everything is sacrificed at the altar of overlong fight sequences. 

Rating: D

The Last Viking (Den Sidste Viking) (2025)

 

A depressing Danish tale with generally confusing and unlikable characters. 

Rating: D

Lorne (2026)

 

Any fan of Saturday Night Live will enjoy this documentary about the man behind the show. It’s not that Lorne’s life is that fascinating, but SNL and Lorne’s interaction with it, is. 

Rating: C

Normal (2025)

 

I like a good town under siege movie as much as the next guy. Normal had some potential, even with the weird Yakuza angle. The barely there plot and characters made it hard to emotionally invest, and so the carnage didn’t carry much weight when bodies hit the floor. 

Rating: C-

The Big Lebowski (1998)

 

Gave this one a second viewing in case I wasn’t able to fully appreciate it back in the day. To be fair, I think I did like it more this time. Certainly one of the Cohen Brothers weirdest, and that’s saying something. More about the characters than a compelling story, and there are some strange ones. 

Rating: C+

Remarkably Bright Creatures (2026)

 

Local octopus helps mend a cleaning lady’s heart. Lots of feels. Happy ending. 

Rating: C+

Buffet Infinity (2025)

 

Literally an endless stream of commercials and clips stitched together to create some kind of mystery. It didn’t work for me. Waste of time.

Rating: F

The Sheep Detectives (2026)

 

Once you get past the CGI sheep, it’s a cute film that focuses on community and a mystery. Made me miss Babe Pig In The City.

Rating: C

I Swear (2025)

 

How effing stupid is this kid’s family, coaches, and school faculty? It’s painfully obvious he’s not behaving normally, and yet they either pretend nothing is wrong or tell him to stop doing something that is clearly out of his control. It doesn’t matter if they’ve never encountered the condition. Something is wrong and they all behave like assholes. It was infuriating to watch, and honestly didn’t seem credible as a plot device. 

Even after he’s diagnosed, the people around him don’t make necessary accommodations to insulate him from hardship and pain. The film is one depressing scene after another. I gave up before reaching the midway point. 

Rating: N/A