Silent Night (2023)

 

The movie is called Silent Night and the lead is “silent” after catching a bullet in the throat. I get the pun. But why does everyone else in the film have to be mute? It’s weird that his wife never talks to him. That she’s ok with him buying a Mustang, artillery, a really expensive camera, etc while she’s holding down a remedial job. Where is all that money coming from? 

John Woo leaves all these plot holes uncovered in pursuit of a big revenge finale that plays more like a MAGAtard’s wet dream. Karanan had no business signing onto this eyesore. 

Rating: F 

Bill & Ted Face The Music (2020)

An inter-dimensional hot mess. I remember very little about the first two films except that they were funny. I’m not opposed to sequels that take place decades later, especially if they are done with the same care and heart that went into Cobra Kai. That wasn’t the case here.

In Face The Music, a washed up Bill & Ted bounce around through space and time trying to steal a great song from themselves while their daughters put together what’s supposed to be the greatest band of all time + Kid Cudi. Nothing made sense and few jokes landed.

Please stop making sequels to classics unless you can do it justice. I’m okay if Goonies 2 never comes out.

Rating: D