Glass Onion (2022)

 

I keep getting sucked into these Knives Out films and then being disappointed when they inevitably collapse into a convoluted mess. There’s a bit of fun, sure. But mostly I’m just waiting around for dots to be connected. 

Rating: C

The Wrecking Crew (2026)

 

Hawaiian brothers Godzilla their way through Oahu, obliterating the bad guys in their path. A bunch of innocent bystanders also get 86'd, but somehow they are never called in to be questioned. 

It’s a check-your-brain-at-the-door carnage film for a Friday night at home. 

Rating: C

The Killer’s Game (2024)

 

I don’t necessarily mind that I’ve already seen a bunch of movies where hitmen try to take out a top hitman. It just needs to be entertaining. Killer’s Game had moments. Started losing interest toward the end. 

Rating: C-

Dune: Part Two (2024)

It was fine. I had to watch some recap videos to remember what happened three years ago in the first one. The sequel doubled down on the holy prophecies and sand worms.

How does one board their entire clan on one of those things anyway? How do you get off? How do you steer them? How do you stop the worm from going underground? Don’t bother asking these questions. The movie has no answers. It’s fine. 

Rating: C

Thor: Love And Thunder (2022)

 

It felt like an endless video game with non-stop flashing graphics. I’m glad Waititi can make a fortune directing this schlock so he can continue pumping out high quality series like Reservation Dogs, What We Do In The Shadows, and Our Flag Means Death. 

Rating: D-

Dune (2021)

 

I thought they did a pretty good job developing the story without confusing the audience. The desert planet was full of creative surprises. Love those dragonfly ships. At two and a half hours, I felt some editing was in order. Plenty of extended shots with dramatic music playing that could have been whittled down. But I’m definitely in for the next installment. 

Rating: C+

Army Of The Dead (2021)

 

Reanimated leftovers from a genre that doesn’t have much left to give. A team was assembled one by one, then later eaten one by one. No one to really root for or miss after they died. Empty calories. 

Rating: C-

Hotel Artemis (2018)

The cast and acting are better than the film deserves. Works in a pinch if you're craving an action movie.

Rating: C

Blade Runner 2049 (2017)

They did a good job matching the tone and slow pace of the original. This update was a bit more coherent. Joi kind of made me want to date a robot. The movie itself was ok.

Rating: C

Guardians Of The Galaxy Vol. 2 (2017)

Flashier and more CGI heavy than the first, which isn’t a compliment. Also it followed the usual superhero narrative where the two big baddies duke it out at the end. I wish there was another way to tell a Marvel story. Sigh.

Rating: C-

Spectre (2015)

That entire opening sequence in Mexico City was stupid. All the ingredients of a cheesy 80s action movie were there. Is that what James Bond is aiming for these days?

This was Sam Mendes cashing in a big paycheck so he could make other films worth seeing. The whole thing was rather boring. The plot was one cliché after another. Leftover leftovers.

Rating: D-

Riddick (2013)

A case where a franchise continues to decline with each additional film. While there were some entertaining sequences, none of them combined merited the making of this third installment. Enjoy the first, then stop.

Rating: C-

Guardians of the Galaxy (2014)

A bit silly and loosely put together, but entertaining enough to warrant a single viewing.

Rating: C

The Man With The Iron Fists (2012)

On par with most other over-the-top martial arts films from Asia. Some interesting fight scenes and weaponry, but overall, nothing to cheer about.

Rating: C-