Black Bag (2025)

 

British espionage with a lot of dialogue. It’s fine. Not exciting enough. 

Rating: C

Moonlight (2016)

Life is hard. Figuring out who you are and how you want to present yourself to the world is hard. Relationships, or the lack of them, is hard. Moonlight is a film about these hardships.

Rating: C+

After The Sunset (2004)

A showy heist film full of pretty people but shallow characters. Not developed enough to make me care about the actors or what happened to them. Ending was pretty lame too.

Rating: D-

Spectre (2015)

That entire opening sequence in Mexico City was stupid. All the ingredients of a cheesy 80s action movie were there. Is that what James Bond is aiming for these days?

This was Sam Mendes cashing in a big paycheck so he could make other films worth seeing. The whole thing was rather boring. The plot was one cliché after another. Leftover leftovers.

Rating: D-

Southpaw (2015)

As a viewer, I feel like I’m supposed to like and root for Jake Gyllenhaal’s character. However, he’s such an asshole, I can’t help but feel he’s getting what he deserves.

And then there’s the matter of no police investigation after his wife is murdered. The cops asked him a few questions and called it a day.

The movie is kind of a downer. I found his relationship with his daughter, especially in the aftermath of the shooting, to be annoying. Even his comeback training was depressing.

He supposedly went undefeated and defended the belt multiple times, and he’s only now learning defense? Didn’t make sense.  Later he struggles through a charity exhibition fight against a nobody. He was an undefeated world title holder for crying out loud.

Some kid named Hoppy who had 2 minutes of screen time gets killed off screen and we are supposed to get emotional about it? No. The film is sloppily put together with unlikable charters doing things that don’t make sense. The whole project was mishandled by Fuqua.

Rating: D-

Miami Vice (2006)

I want to start off by saying that this film had virtually zero connection to the original TV show. I'm not saying that's a bad thing, but it could have passed as any other undercover cop flick.

The flash and fun is gone, replaced with dark and dismal. The story holds up, but so does an episode of CSI. We expect to be more entertained than a normal night at home with the tube. A popcorn movie. This one was missing the pop.

Rating: C-

Ninja Assassin (2009)

Bloodier than I anticipated, and I anticipated buckets. Production is very slick. I had forgotten that the Wachowskis were involved. You get much more plot and back story than usual for this type of film. For what it was, I thought they pulled it off. Fight scenes looked amazing, especially on Blu-Ray. It's astonishing they got away with an R rating. A perfect action fix.

Rating: C+

Skyfall (2012)

Skyfall opens with a ridiculous chase scene between Bond and an unknown bad guy. At this point in the film, I have zero emotional investment, so my eyes are glazing over as motorcycles hop across rooftops like it’s the interstate.

This is the kind of chase scene that takes months to shoot, requires dozens of stuntmen, and an IQ lower than 7 to believe any of it is possible off screen. A good action film needs to be realistic enough so that I can at least give them the benefit of the doubt that what they are showing me is conceivable in real life. Otherwise, it’s pure fantasy and I could care less which characters live or die.

Frankly, I expected more from a Sam Mendes helmed Bond movie than rehashed plots and generic gun-play.

Rating: C-

Street Kings (2008)

It's hard to impress audiences these days with a dirty cop thriller, what with The Departed, Training Day, and F/X's The Shield. How do you live up to those? You got to give Street Kings props for making a worthy effort. Things start out a bit convoluted, but improve as the film progresses.

Rating: C+

Pirates of the Caribbean: Dead Man's Chest (2006)

Didn't care for the original--cared for this one even less. Is it too much to ask not to mix the pirate genre with sci-fi? I'd give my left leg in exchange for a wooden one for a decent R rated pirate movie with a real plot, sweet violence, and high production value. Go ahead. Name me one highly acclaimed pirate movie. You can't!

Rating: D