Furious 7 (2015)

See my reviews for the last 3 or 4 films in this ridiculous franchise.

Rating: D

Four Brothers (2005)

Caught this one in the theater opening weekend. I liked the acting and direction, but I felt the story was a bit weak. Seemed like a lot of effort to fabricate a reason to kill some old lady so that a revenge plot could kick in. Still, it was a good dose of entertaining violence.

Rating: C+

Transformers (2007)

What they pulled off on screen was truly eye popping magic. Michael Bay can summon up special effects like Moses commands water. Unfortunately, his unearthly powers are useless against the evil forces of dialogue & character development. It's like watching a tired after school special on steroids. Seriously, could they not come up with something better than "hot girl ditches meathead jock for skinny nerd with a destiny?" And how many high schools actually have a girl who looks like Megan Fox? Not mine.

Despite the abhorrent banter, the film is still very watchable. I grew up with these toys, and it was fun seeing them come to life on screen.

Rating: C

Fast & Furious 6 (2013)

It doesn’t look like they are going to stop making these, and I’m as much to blame as anyone. I’ve seen the first 5. I can’t help myself. This latest installment breaks all laws of physics, depicting action sequences that not even a highly Caffeinated teenage boys would believe. I watch these films to see what a 100+ million dollar budget looks like when it’s spattered across the screen. None of it will make sense, but it’s pretty to look at.

Rating: C-

Legion (2009)

For an action film, there was way too much drama and chit chat in the middle, when things slowed down to a crawl. There were literally 4-5 perfect moments to use the restroom, had I needed to pee.

Since the story wasn't anything spectacular, and the cinematography basically consisted of the same boring set, the action needed to be amped up significantly in order for this to be entertaining. Poorly executed.

Rating: D+

2 Fast 2 Furious (2003)

I liked the original better, but still had fun watching this one. My entire house was thumping from the fantastic sound on the DVD. If you aren't feeling a movie like this instead of just watching it, then its faults will get in the way of your viewing pleasure.

Acting was very poor. Ludacris gave the best performance in my opinion. Great car racing scenes and plenty of action. I thought the short movie prequel on the DVD was a great idea... linking both movies together.

Rating: C

Death Race (2008)

Racing souped up cars to the death in hopes of receiving your freedom from prison. What warm blooded male could pass it up? All the violence, explosions, and car wrecks you can handle. Joan Allen's presence helps you take this one more seriously. Don't expect to be impressed, just entertained.

Rating: C

Fast Five (2011)

I’ll bet if I was 7 this would be the greatest movie of all time. But as an adult, I can’t help wondering how I’m supposed to root for a group of people who do a billion dollars worth of infrastructure damage to the city of Rio, killing I don’t know how many countless innocent bystanders, all while stealing a bunch of money.

The acting was fair to poor. The stunts are beyond ridiculous. It might as well be a superhero movie, because each of the main characters would have died 10 times over in real life. It makes The Italian Job look like a documentary. At the same time, it looked and sounded amazing on Blu-Ray. It’s getting harder to check my brain at the door, but I still enjoy a seeing a 100 million+ dollars sprayed across the screen for my entertainment.

Rating: C