The End We Start From (2023)

 

An interesting semi-post-apocalyptic premise that had some nice narrative flourishes. But like the city, the story got bogged down, with very little happening. I appreciate good dialogue and characters, but stuff needs to actually happen. It’s a shame they didn’t do more with it. 

Rating: C-

Shazam! (2019)

Kids transform into adult with superpowers, which causes almost no shock, concern, or bewilderment among the general public. The script appears to have been written by a child inhabiting the body of an adult screenwriter. 

Rating: D

Cruella (2021)

 

Shockingly good. Emma Stone will knock your designer socks off. She’s a lock for Best Actress and the film should definitely win for makeup and costume design. But what I enjoyed the most was the killer soundtrack. A lot of bold choices. I simply didn’t expect to love a Disney film this much. 

Rating: B+

Sherlock Holmes (2009)

The pairing of Guy Ritchie and Robert Downey Jr. was a good match. Gritty action reminiscent of Snatch combined with the wit and sarcasm of Downey. I was a bit surprised by the dark nature of the plot, but eventually got on board towards the end of the film.

Rating: C+

Kingsman: The Golden Circle (2017)

Quite a letdown after such a fun and original first film. This felt more like a cheap imitation that played on cliques and CGI to make up for a mishmash script and stunt casting.

Rating: D

Babylon A.D. (2008)

The Transporter meets Children of Men, only without the tight editing and script. Someone bit off more than they could chew here. Direction was scattershot, dialogue was woeful, acting was sub par, and the screenplay needed a few more revisions. Too much movie trying to be squeezed into a 90 minute package.

Rating: D

Kingsman: The Secret Service (2014)

Perhaps a glimpse of what the James Bond franchise could be with some new blood behind the camera? This is a sneaky film. It presents itself as an old codger spy throwback, but in reality it’s a balls out, over-the-top, head popping splatterfest. Which is to say, I enjoyed it. Belief has to be suspended, as the plot is borderline Austin Powers crazy, but it’s a fun crazy, with Samuel J going for broke.

Rating: B-

The Brothers Grimsby (2016)

Painfully unfunny. The entire film is a crime against humanity.

Rating: F

Sunshine (2007)

What on Earth, or should I say, the sun, inspired Danny Boyle to do a space flick? I'm not complaining, it just seemed an odd pairing. The result is a high tension space drama with a unique mission—reignite the sun.

I liked 75% of the film. The last great moment was when the ship computer reveals there are still 5 people on board, not 4. (You'll understand when you see it) But after we find out who it is, things go downhill fast. Suddenly plot holes appear everywhere, and a tight drama is replaced with cheap horror. This star faded.

Rating: C

Stardust (2007)

Very inventive and fun once the story got under way. It's quite humorous at times too. Claire Danes is delightful as the star. Great cast altogether. This is one the whole family would enjoy watching together.

Rating: B-

Welcome To The Punch (2013)

Not terrible, just sloppy storytelling. No depth to the characters. Full of action movie clichés.

Rating: D+

Body Of Lies (2008)

A Syrianna-esque action/thriller that can be quite brutal at times. Involving the Jordanian Intelligence Agency was a good story device. DiCaprio is believable as a CIA operative. Locations and cinematography are what you'd expect from a Ridley Scott Film.

Rating: B-

The Guard (2011)

An Irish black comedy about an atypical policeman and an international drug deal. Don Cheadle plays the American FBI agent. I enjoyed the politically incorrect pokes they made at The US and the odd personalities residing on the island. Gleeson played a unique character himself. Some good fun from across the pond.

Rating: C+

Kick-Ass (2010)

The movie lived up to the hype. All the ass-kicking I had hoped for and then some. Funny, crude, ultra-violent, and creative. Loved it. Hit Girl reminded me of a young Natalie Portman in The Professional (Leon). Nic Cage came off as lovable for a change, perhaps because he was channeling his inner Raising Arizona days. It was a great premise that delivered. Looking forward to future sequels.

Rating: A-

Zero Dark Thirty (2012)

There’s a lot of torture and paperwork to wade through before the big payoff at the end arrives. Plenty of cruelty and human suffering from both sides as well. Don’t mistake this for a traditional action movie—just one really long reenactment. Films should not be nominated for best picture simply because they depict Osama being shot in the head.

Rating: C+

The Secret World of Arrietty (Kari-gurashi no Arietti) (2010)

Arrietty is the story of a family of creepy little people that live in the walls and steal for a living. It’s a mystery why spiders haven’t sucked out their insides yet. Despite being the size of large bugs, they can still use their miniature vocal chords to carry on a normal conversation with a human across the room.

The human boy in the story secretly wants to get it on with teeny tiny Arrietty. He actually gets her into his bed after their first conversation. Alas, his wiener is the size of her entire body. To show his love, he nearly kills her family by renovating their home with them still inside. Then he spouts off about death and the end of the world. He’s a creepy sick kid.

But it’s the housekeeper who beats them all. She’s a complete psychopathic loon who gets her rocks off terrorizing the little people for her amusement. In the end, the minis move away for no apparent reason. Roll credits.

Rating: D

Tinker Tailor Soldier Spy

A lot of buildup and fine acting for a fizzle of a reveal at the end. And they certainly took their sweet time getting there. Pretentious and dry.

Rating: D+

Robin Hood (2010)

It's a shame this didn't make a lot of money, because I'd love to see a sequel. I watched the director's cut on Blu-Ray, and really enjoyed the story of Robin Hood's origin. Films of epic proportions don't come along everyday, and this is a good one. Some might be bothered by the length, but I was fully engaged the entire time. Everything was done top notch. Looked and sounded terrific.

Rating: B-

John Carter (2012)

I read the series as a kid, but nothing in the film seemed familiar. Friends of mine who read the books more recently said they played fast and loose with their interpretation. If you can get past the terrible dialogue, delivery, and trite plot devices, it’s a fun way to spend a couple hours. Looked great on the big screen. Curious if they can make their money back.

Rating: C

Revolver (2005)

A real mishmash of ideas that never fully realize. There were bits and pieces of a good movie in there, but they unfortunately they got lost in the confusion. I didn't buy it.

Rating: D+